Anger: Grip~Sort~Relax

Proverbs 4:23 Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life.

Psalm 37:8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; do not fret—it only causes harm.

Whether it is that type of intense and immediate shock of anger or the anger that slowly builds like snow piling up for an avalanche, we need to realize that it’s an alarm that something needs to change; then:

1. Recognize this will take concentrated effort to proceed in healthy direction

2. Slow yourself down

3. Honestly talk to God and listen to Him while scrutinizing the situation and evaluating the healthiest way to respond

These things lead toward healthy response.
In one short phrase, name one thing that angered you at some point in the past two weeks. Please, exercise self-control, and do not explain it at all yet. Just write down one short phrase.
If we’re not careful, it is easy to run off on tangents.

Ephesians 6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

James 3:13 Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. 14 But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. 15 This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. 16 For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.

Not only do we talk and listen to God, other people, and ourselves, but we can also allow ourselves to be influenced by spiritual entities “whispering” or “hollering” false and ungodly ideas.

In one sentence or less, what was your first thought about the issue that angered you (please, exercise self-control; at this point don’t tell us anything more than that one sentence)?

Ephesians 4:29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.

We each live according to our own perspectives 100% of the time. When we talk we ourselves are among those who hear.

Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

What/who we pay attention to and what we tell ourselves about it all develops our perspectives. When recognized for what it really is, we can see that anger itself is a good thing—it’s an indicator that something needs to change. What we do about it can be a good thing or harmful.

You gave phrase naming the issue that angered you and gave your very first thought about it. Please repeat that very first thought and then briefly explain how things proceeded.

God tells us to get hold of it and how to sort out our thoughts to gain/maintain healthy perspectives, and to relax.

Psalm 4:4 Be angry, and do not sin. Meditate within your heart on your bed, and be still. Selah

A biblical meditation that will help us to grip the situation rather than let it get away from healthy control, to sort through it, and relax is the Shema, which Jesus placed at the crux of our God-given purpose.

Mark 12:29-31

How can you conceive of using the Shema as a meditation to help you get grip, sort through, and relax?

Perspective

From the corner of your eye you see a 13yr old boy crossing to your side of the street, but don't give him much thought. Moments later you hear his voice. "Give me your wallet." And you feel his gun sticking into the small of your back.

Putting all machismo aside, you realize that your life isn't worth your wallet

What do you do?

But, wait, before you do anything... somehow you learn that it isn't a real gun, but a toy.

 

Now what do you want do?

But, wait, before you do anything... somehow you learn that he didn't want to mug you. He didn't even want to make anyone upset. He was forced by his mom's boyfriend, who said he'd beat him if he didn't (and he'd beaten him before).

 

 

 

Now what do you want do?

We may be influenced, coerced, even deceived, yet we each live according to our own perspectives 100% of the time.
Harmonizing your perspective to the truth is the only way to intentionally and consistently make the healthiest possible choices. Remember, for our benefit Jesus tells us:

“I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”

John 14:6

Fight or Flight

Ephesians 4:26 “Be angry and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down upon your wrath, 27 nor give place to the devil.

When the anger “alarm system” goes off, the arousal of “fight or flight” is our inborn carnal response. It takes strength and practice to transcend that carnal response. This is not always easy and is often painful.

Hebrews 12:11 Now no chastening^a seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who are trained by it.

^adiscipline

What unhealthy habits need to be crucified?

How do you go about crucifying those unhealthy habits?

How does your relationship with God factor into this?

Ephesians 4:29 Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.

What practices can you implement to build strength of healthy habits that transcend “fight or flight”?

How does your relationship with God factor into this?

What are your thoughts on the phrase “emotional resilience”?

What are your thoughts on assertiveness?

Healthy discipline is the strength building effort that presses through every pain to gain what you need especially when you don’t feel like it!